Saying “no” can be enourmously difficult and there are even books to teach people the skill. For example the book by Sarah Knight “F**k No! is a bestseller that provides extensive information on the subject and may have helped many people to become confident in saying “no” However, as difficult as it may be, when … Continue reading Taking “No” For An Answer
All children are born very needy and dependent. They simply cannot survive without a responsible adult providing the necessary care. Besides basic needs for food, shelter, clothing and safety, there are emotional needs for attention, validation, support and company. Those lucky babies born into families that expect them and are prepared to look after them … Continue reading Emotional Scars: The Legacy Of Adverse Childhood Experiences
Trauma survivors often ponder about the question of forgiveness and find it difficult to resolve. Should one forgive their mother for abandoning them? Should one forgive their father for emotional and physical abuse? Is forgiving one’s parents a necessary part of the recovery process? Will “not forgiving” leave a person with a constant sense of … Continue reading Should I Forgive My Parents? Letting Go And Holding On For Childhood Trauma Survivors.
Ever caught yourself in a cycle of self-blame? Ever felt like procrastinating, under-performing, and then pushing yourself even harder, forcing yourself into doing stuff and failing to keep up with your own demands, then hating yourself, spiraling further into feeling not worthy. Failed projects, failed plans to follow the diet or exercise, failed attempts to … Continue reading Making Friends With Your Self-Critic. A Pathway Towards Higher Self-Esteem.
I don’t like the word narcissist. It’s a blunt and primitive description of a complex cluster of behaviors and feelings. However, rather than complicating this post with a mouthful of more descriptive terminology (such as “people with narcissistic personality traits”) I will rather settle for one word, and stick to it. So here comes a … Continue reading Narcissists In Therapy
Would you agree that low self-esteem underpins many mental health issues today? When I hear about the rising cases of depression, anxiety, panic attacks, bipolar disorders in the modern world, I wonder how many people suffer form those because they don’t like themselves very much. In my practice I’ve assessed hundreds of clients who tell … Continue reading High Price We Pay For Low Self-esteem
Q&A from presentation for BPD Network, Mental Health Professionals, Sydney
Next time you think you are being too demanding, too jealous or too “needy” in your relationship, think again. Are any of your feelings and behaviors happening as a result of your partner's actions? Perhaps you notice telling yourself over and over again that your relationship is secure, that your partner loves you, that you … Continue reading 3 Questions To Ask Your Insecure Self
Over a dinner with a personal trainer Sammy a topic of body image came up and it struck us both how often we witness poor body images in people we work with. Sammy mentioned that her clients often dislike, judge or even hate their bodies. I also noted how many of my clients struggle with their body … Continue reading Looking After Your Body